People routinely ask me why I became vegetarian – some out of mild curiosity, others out of confusion, and some with utter disdain upon their lips. Now, I can understand all three. Heck, I’ve experienced all three myself, once-upon-an-ignorant-time ago. I gave some thought to how best to express the reasoning behind my decision, as I could appreciate how absurd or nonsensical it might sound to some, and the below is what I arrived at. Take it for what it is, not for what it isn’t.
During the closing days of last year, I was in a bit of a dark place – coming off the back of some of the roughest months I’d lived through in a very long time. I didn’t realise it then, but I was clinically depressed, and was struggling to process the multifarious things wrong in my life. Before I continue, I must stress this isn’t a “woe is me” sort of tale, but setting the scene is fundamental to enlightening you on where it is I am coming from. Anyway, I felt very isolated – not for lack of trying on some people’s part, but that’s what depression does to you – and hopelessness was an everyday occurrence for me.
The one, shining light for me was my interaction with animals. Humans seemingly brought nothing but despair and heartbreak in everything I had to do with them. Animals were uplifting, precious reminders that the world and all creation has the fundamental ability to be good and innocent. The intention of humans can be duplicitous and disingenuous, but animals show you unadulterated and unconditional love and affection.
At the time, I was working part-time for my family business – a dog-orientated tea and coffee shop – which meant that I was surrounded as much by animals as I was humans; over time, something that would begin to alleviate the feelings of isolation and loneliness. Over the coming months, the time spent with cuties such as those below had a profound impact on my mental well-being; changing a negative headspace into one that could perceive light at the end of the tunnel. Happiness, positivity, hopefulness. All things I hadn’t felt in ages, and felt like I’d perhaps never feel again – of course this all seems very histrionic now, but despair does things to a person.
At around the same time, I hung out with a very dear friend of mine, who had recently become a vegetarian himself and we had a very stark conversation about the realities of eating commercially available meat and the ethics attached to it. Essentially, our conversation boiled down to the concept of “why should we get to eat something we wouldn’t be prepared to kill in order to do so”. Taking this point further, we both agreed that neither of us would realistically be willing to kill an animal just for the sole purpose of eating it, and fulfilling that desire/luxury. After 24 years of being an omnivore – many of which were passionately bordering carnivorous, and fervently anti-vegetarian – I finally realised I could no longer justify eating something that I couldn’t be morally supportive of. It felt hypocritical to be fine with passing on the responsibility of the murder of perfectly innocent animals onto someone else. Essentially, I was propagating the business of murder. Something that I couldn’t morally reconcile within my own conscience.
When I got home that night, I sat there and thought about what my friend and I had discussed. Could I kill an animal purely for the pleasure of consumption? Probably not. Then I made it more relatable, and personal. Could I or would I murder one of the animals that had provided me such comfort when I had needed it most? Most definitely not. But, then I realised, it wasn’t just the animals I knew intimately that had given me life again. It was any and all animals – the unbridled joy of nature, and what wonderfully accepting creatures they inherently are.
Lastly, on the back of a pretty significant weight loss, I realised it wasn’t just my bodyweight that needed addressing. My diet was a shambles – fatty foods, processed foods, unbalanced macros. I just didn’t care what I ate. I figured that vegetarianism needn’t simply be a moral statement. It could be a chance to start afresh, and make a change for me as well as them. Within weeks, I felt more awake and more alive than I had felt in years. Sure, there was a learning curve (dropping protein without substitutes isn’t a wise idea. Trust me.), but once I had a handle on it, everything just kinda flowed.
It’s at this point I feel I should highlight that I didn’t – and, indeed haven’t – taken a passionate disdain for the taste, texture or act of eating meat. I still very much enjoy eating it, and very much crave it from time to time. But, I made a moral decision, and it’s one I find easier to stick to with each passing day. Funnily enough, on the odd occasion I have had meat in the nigh six months since beginning this change, I haven’t enjoyed it and has left me feeling unwell to boot!
Now, I appreciate some – or maybe all, depending on your sensitivity – of this will come across as rather self-righteous, and preachy, but please don’t think that’s my intention. Long ago, I became at peace with the fact that we won’t all see things the same way. People will choose to live their lives how they see fit, and I will live mine. All I wanted to do was try and elucidate the reasons why I made the lifestyle choice that I did in a hope that, whilst they may not agree, people would understand a little more. Animals saved me in every way a human needs saving – for that I am eternally indebted.
Sanatana jiva.
MOANING SUITS 
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